Generation X gingerly exits his white 2008 Corvette, leaning on his trademark sledgehammer for support. The man sometimes know as The Godsend has on a pair of dark, Armani sunglasses and cringes at the echo of the slamming door.
"Never again," Generation X quips to no one. "I'm going to just stop waking up." From off-screen Jacki enters with a microphone, looking a little anxious at approaching a man with a reputation for senseless acts of alcohol fueled violence. Jacki, showing her nerves, stutters as she asks, almost shrilly, to interview the new comer.
"Damn Becky, keep your voice down. I don't like loud noises. I tend to quiet down loud noises. Ask my neighbors dog. Gave new meaning to the phrase, 'hair of the dog that bit ya.'"
Jacki clears her throat, blinks and tries not to show her disgust. "It's Jacki. Generation X. How do you feel about your loss to Ratface last week? Anything you can pinpoint as to where you went wrong?"
"Well, for starters, I was piss drunk. I mean, you put me in a half-assed match, with an assface looking dude, and expect me to take it seriously? I got a better fight in a drunken bar brawl that morning then I got out of Ratbreath. Hell, I've spent the past few days drinking just to get his stench out of my nose. Listen, when I took this contract, I expected better from the owners than to degrade me with sub par challengers. I mean, who's next? You Becky? The Valet? If that's the case, I'll just threw the next match too."
"You're saying you threw the match?"
"Of course I did. You ever try to wrestling on your seventeenth shot? I could barely see. I thought it was a three on one. And I still looked great. That's why I'm the Godsend. Not buttface, not the Fighting Irishman, who I think may actually be English. Me. Generation X. And like my viking brethren, I send out a challenge to anyone who thinks they can stand up to me in the ring. I'll be there in the ring, with Sledgy in one hand, and a bottle of Jameson in the other. And if I deem you good enough, I won't drink that bottle. I'll smash it over your head. The way I look at it is, win if you want to, survive," Generation X takes a long drink from his flask, "If I let you!" Generation X shoulders his way past Jacki. "See you around Becks."
Thu Feb 12, 2009 1:46 am